Tuesday, March 1, 2011

The First Annual Business Flannel Award For Outstanding Picture of a Dog

Yesterday, The Atlantic's wonderful "In Focus" blog posted a collection of photographs from Afghanistan. Normally, we here at Business Flannel don't spend much time discussing the ongoing United States involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan. This is not for lack of trying: the Business Flannel conference room, where we think up jokes and take money baths, has a large poster labeled "Iraq/Afghanistan" where our writers are encouraged to write up sketch ideas as they occur. So far all we have is "Afghan = person, also type of blanket??", but we're optimistic.

Our favorite photo from the "In Focus" was taken by AP photographer Dar Yasin, and bore the caption "An Afghan dog owner waits to take part in a dog fight in Kabul, Afghanistan, Friday, Feb. 18, 2011. Dog fighting is a popular pastime amongst Afghans during the winter season and the public matches are held every Friday, which is the official weekly holiday in Afghanistan."

Worried that the photo is going to be gruesome? Intimidated by the idea of a culture where dogfighting is a popular pastime, in much the same way that eating cookies while watching "60 Minutes" is a popular pastime in your country? Already laughing at the idea that an "Afghan dog owner" is a person, and also a type of blanket?

Well, forget everything you know about dog fighting photos, as I present The First Annual Business Flannel Award for Outstanding Picture of a Dog:

  • Ok, first off, clearly that's a leopard. Or a dog's head grafted onto the body of a small jungle cat.
  • Or, possibly, a dog wearing a leopard print pre-fight tracksuit.
  • For an animal about to savagely attack another animal, this dog-leopard is really fluffy. Look the the bunches of chubby neck fur around the collar. This is an animal made for giving slobber kisses.
  • Speaking of the collar, did the owner borrow it from a reindeer trainer? Don't fighters usually avoid accessories that can be mistaken for small, dyed hamsters?
  • Seriously, what kind of animal is this?

One thing we can all agree on is that this is an outstanding picture of some sort of animal, and, because at least 50% of Business Flannel members were willing to identify this animal as "fairly" or "somewhat doglike", we have decided to award it The First Annual Business Flannel Award for Outstanding Picture of a Dog.

To our other contenders, Bo Obama, the winner of the Westminster show, and Jack Black, don't despair: it's an honor just to be nominated.

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